Monthly Archives: August 2013

Should I do a PhD?

The results of the pie chart are 50/50. This means you are not yet certain you want to do a PhD. Keep working in that pub/library/insert name of bland student job here until you are sure you want to commit … Continue reading

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Should I join Twitter?

Yay! You already have a Twitter account that you never use. This means you can be justifiably smug about hating Twitter because you aren’t just one of those people who never tried it/doesn’t get it. Bully for you!

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Should I have sex with a vegetarian?

Hell no! Paranoia and sex don’t mix so steer clear of your veggie peer!

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When is the right time to make a move on the object of my desire?

Yay! Take your crush out for drinks and don’t stop guzzling until you’re both horizontal (though not in a paralytically drunk or unconscious way).

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How do you know if someone likes you?

Yay! There is a 50/50 chance that this person likes you. In order to avoid embarrassment, you may wish to refer to other pie chart outcomes such as “When is the right time to make a move on the object … Continue reading

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How do you know if you really like someone?

Hell no! That joker don’t float your boat. Go cast your net elsewhere.

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Should I have sex on the first date?

The outcome of this pie chart is inconclusive. Use your best judgment to make the right choice for you. You may wish to refer to other pie chart outcomes in order to help with this, for example, “How do you … Continue reading

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Should I rebel against the machine?

Hell no! Never rebel against a metaphorical machine when you don’t actually know what you’re talking about.

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Should I marry my current boyfriend/girlfriend?

Hell no! Under no circumstances should you marry your current partner.

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Should I get a puppy/kitten/carpet snake/insert name of desired pet here?

Hell no! Under no circumstances get a pet of any species right now.

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